


I Saw

by VisionaryGalaxy



Series: A Thousand Futures of Me and You [71]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Boys In Love, Don't copy to another site, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, M/M, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Short & Sweet, Tony Stark Has A Heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-02
Updated: 2019-03-02
Packaged: 2019-11-07 21:51:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17968700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VisionaryGalaxy/pseuds/VisionaryGalaxy
Summary: Hope brightened Tony’s eyes, “us,” he said reverently. “I saw us, and it was beautiful.”





	I Saw

**Author's Note:**

> My normal upload for the night lol.

_I love you._

   The words were on the tip of his tongue, tingling the edges of his lips where they were sealed tightly together, on his otherwise impassive face. Those three maddening, loathsome words, forever burning inside him like they could one day wear him down and escape from the carefully crafted prison he confined them to.

   It didn’t help that the object of that devastating affection was sitting in front of him on an identical barstool, hands gesturing and swinging as he explained his most recent project and how he thought magic could be used with it one day.

   He wouldn’t normally torture himself like this, knew better then to surround himself with the very people that plagued his dreams and nightmares in equal measure, but tonight was an exception, a poorly planned exception.

   The Avengers were celebrating. It had been one year since the Snap, since they had successfully defeated Thanos and returned those lost to the Soul Stone. It was a special occasion, attended by every major player except for the Guardians, and Stephen had to rely on small mercies. He almost hadn’t come, unsure he could look into these friendly, _grateful_ faces and keep up the act, pretend like he didn’t know absolutely everything about them, their fears, their loves, their motivations, their regrets, their hearts.

   He had taken one small precaution, however, and that was the Time Stone dangling in plain view around his neck. The Avengers, as much as they wanted to thank him and try to draw him into their world, were too weary of the Stone to hang around for long, keeping contact to a minimum.

   Except for Tony.

   This man had no concept of leaving well enough alone, made evident in the aftermath of Thanos, when he showed up at the Sanctuary unannounced on a weekly basis. While he claimed Tony was being rude and inconsiderate, Stephen was silently cursing the man for making his insides twist sickly and his mind to suffer through a thousand more lives. And as he was learning tonight, Tony also had no concept of personal space. He had been casually touching Stephen all night; brush of the arms, patting of the shoulder, brushing off of some microscopic spec. It was unbearable, because every time he looked into those warm brown eyes, those words burned on his lips and his soul fucking _screamed_.

   The truth was, Stephen was far from oblivious…on all accounts.

   He knew the man in front of him so well that his intentions had been clear from the start, the man an open book from no fault of his own. Tony’s abrupt visits to the Sanctuary were originally motivated by weariness, the need to know what powers lurked beyond his comprehension and to assess Stephen’s loyalty. If only the people in this room could know how quickly he would die for any one of them without thinking twice.

   When it changed five months in, to slow smiles, lingering gazes, sudden takeout, and questions growing increasingly about him and less about magic, Stephen wanted to cry because it was so fucking unfair. He watched in slow motion as Tony Stark fell for him, watched with each step playing out in his head a moment before it did.

   See, the Time Stone was far from straight forward. It was impossible for Stephen to see further then two months into the future, and even harder to remember it all. Yet, he spent those two months seeing the same people fourteen thousand times and that is more then enough time to know someone as intimately as you can. He knew Tony so well he could recite his words before he said them sometimes, not because he saw it, but because his patterns were engraved in Stephen’s mind.

   He fell in love, watching those futures, watched the brightest soul he had ever seen shine and die over and over again. Saw him at his absolute worst and his most righteous and it was a sight to behold, Antony Edward Stark was a god among men.

   “Stephen?”

   He blinked rapidly at Tony whose expression was equal parts curious and concerned. Stephen forced a smile, going for reassuring, though he knew it much be rather wobbly at this point, “I’m alright. I was actually thinking I should-”

   “Come to the lab with me,” Tony interrupted suddenly, eyes darting to the doorway. “Please? I wanted to talk to you about something.”

   Dread slithered through Stephen, even as he nodded silently, even as he stood on weak legs and followed Tony from the room, well-aware of the eyes on his back. Tony was silent on the short journey, but of course not to Stephen. The tension in his shoulders, the way he kept glancing back to make sure he was following, was all he needed to tell the story.

   The stepped in and the glass door sealed behind them, Tony motioned at the two chairs and couch pushed to the corner of the room, far comfier then the work ones scattered about. Stephen took a seat on the couch and watched as Tony sat, not even a full cushion away from him.

   He fiddled with his hands, eyes downcast and Stephen felt his throat tighten. He was tired, so very tired never feeling as though he had caught up since being released from the Soul Stone. Part of him wondered if it was his body finally catching up with the age of his mind.

   “Why did you want to see me Tony?” he asked the question, knowing it would end this all the sooner.

   Tony ran a hand through his hair and then suddenly his warm brown eyes were on his, unsure and determined in equal measures, “I wanted to talk to you about us.”

   “Us?” he tried playing dumb. Tony’s advances had been growing increasingly forward as of late as though afraid he had missed the subtle hints, he hadn’t.

   Tony offered a wry smile, “I know you’ve noticed.”

   Why did it have to hurt so much? _I love you._ He closed his eyes tightly, “Tony…” he couldn’t keep his voice from breaking.

   Hands were suddenly gripping his, careful, lovingly, warm and reassuring. He opened them to see Tony leaning forward, brows furrowed in distress like it pained him to see Stephen so conflicted, “what’s wrong? I know you like me, it isn’t hard to tell. So, why? What’s holding you back?”

   Such a startlingly clear observation wouldn’t be surprising for a genius except Stephen knew it was simply Tony, marvelous, heroic Tony. Stephen took a deep breath, urging himself to tear it off like a band-aid. To cut ties with this man and embrace the hole threatening in his chest at the prospect of ridding his life of the man.

   “I can’t Tony. I’m so sorry. A relationship…its not viable between us.”

   Tony’s jaw clenched, Stephen could see it working from here, knew to look for it, “that isn’t a reason.”

   “Tony,” Stephen began again, eyes closing as he tried to order the barrage of memories and thoughts raging inside his head. “You don’t know me, not really. But I know you, I know you so well that I can guess what you’ll say, how you’ll react in any given situation.”

   “What?” Tony’s expression was twisted in confusion.

   “The Time Stone. I’ve seen and learned everything about you, I know so much about you, its like I’ve been with you for six lifetimes already.”

   Tony nodded slowly, clearly processing and Stephen wasn’t even surprised when he spoke, “I’m only seeing reasons why we should give this a chance.”

   Stephen groaned, unable to help himself, “everything I saw, it hardly constitutes a healthy relationship, I’ll know your decisions and opinions on things before you do, I have dozens upon dozens of false memories in my head of us, or you that I still can’t get right.”

   Tony blinked, “do you…do you know which ones were from this timeline?”

   Stephen lowered his eyes again, “most of the time yes, but sometimes it gets fuzzy. I know you feel something for me Tony, I’ve known all along but you can’t be happy with me and I…” he took a harsh breath, it hurt, it was like he was tearing his soul in half bit by bit, “can’t be happy with you either.”

   He expected Tony to grow cold, close off and politely dismiss him, it was what he had been aiming for, but for the first time in the past year, Tony Stark surprised him. The hands holding his tightened, not enough to hurt but enough to make it clear he wasn’t happy.

   When he looked up at him, Tony’s eyes were blazing with denial, a breathtaking sight he had seen in nine hundred and six futures for various reasons, all directed at a gloating Thanos, it was intimidating to have it levelled on him.

   “Bullshit,” he said simply.

   It was Stephen’s turn to blink, “what?”

   “I get what you are doing, I really do.”

   “And what am I doing?” Stephen asked cautiously.

   “Protecting yourself,” Tony stated confidently. “I know you are still adjusting and I’m willing to give you time, I’m willing to help you if you let me. All those futures you saw…I know it was a lot and that it must fuck with you to know so much about me and the team…but it doesn’t matter.”

   “Doesn’t matter?” Stephen repeated dumbly.

   He nodded, “yeah, because you weren’t the only one who saw things during the Snap.”

   Stephen stared at him uncomprehendingly.

   Tony lifted his hands and pressed a gentle kiss to several fingers and didn’t meet his eyes as he revealed a secret that blew Stephen’s mind, shattered his heart, and left him feeling put out to sea in the midst of a storm with no way back.

   “When I put on the Gauntlet, it was a lot. It felt like it was tearing me apart, burning my skin and leaving me in ash. I had to find a reason, a conviction to get control and it began to show me things, like it wanted to help. I saw people who were dusted, Peter I saw a lot of, and to my surprise…I saw you.”

   Tony glanced up at him anxiously, but Stephen was struggling to hear over the pounding of his heart.

   “It was only natural, I figure seeing as you gave up your life for me, for the team,” Tony offered a self-deprecating laugh. “But then I couldn’t stop, I should have, I know that. It didn’t stop me though, I got to see everything, your past, your future, a bit anyway. I…this is going to be a lot, which is a theme for me, so you better get used to it…” he took a shuddering breath. “I fell in love with you.”

   Stephen just stared at him, his words not filtering into his brain, denying the evidence in front of him. He had spent the last few months convincing himself that a relationship between them would end in disaster and he couldn’t decide if this made it better or so much worse.

   His silence seemed to unsettle Tony who shifted closer again, his hands moving up to grip his wrists as he spoke quietly, insistently, “I thought all the same things you did, but you just told me that you know all this stuff about me too and doesn’t that put us on equal ground?”

   Did it? Stephen wasn’t sure. Still, he found himself unable to look away from Tony, from the man that had stolen his heart without knowing it, callously and uncaring, offering it back to him in this strange way. His mouth moved on its own, the words slipping out despite himself, “what did you see?”

   Hope brightened Tony’s eyes, “ _us_ ,” he said reverently. “I saw us, and it was _beautiful_.”

   Stephen couldn’t help the stinging in his eyes as he found himself being pulled into a hug, Tony’s face pressed tightly against his neck, a hand running soothingly through his hair, his favourite spot to be petted.

_I love you._

   His lips tingled, his tongue burned, his throat tightened, his heart beat a hectic rhythm, his stomach twisted.

   “I love you.”

   All those horrible sensations stopped, replaced with the soft, loving voice in his ear echoing him, the hand in his hair, the arm holding him tightly, the feeling of something clicking solidly into place, like the universe itself had just granted them a reprieve from suffering.

   The sounds and images in his head quieted and for the first time in a year, Stephen felt like he was real, like this was real, like he was no longer floating in the abyss of possibilities.

**Author's Note:**

> I love hearing what people think! Kudos and comments always appreciated.


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